Sunday, February 26, 2012

Flavor of the Week: Michael Del Zotto

Flavor of the Week is a feature on OGOP that will focus on one NHL player and what makes him crush worthy/completely objectify him. Warning: this post is girly and shallow! But I promise it will be semi-informative, maybe. This week we will be featuring New York Rangers Defenseman Michael Del Zotto.

Michael gives his selection as Flavor of the Week two thumbs up!

How you doin' Michael Del Zotto? That's how they say what's up in NYC. I think. Whatever, moving on. Michael is this weeks flavor of the week! Woooo! Why? Well look at that face! Also his name is awesome. It sound like some New York mobster's name. I bet when he pays for shit in NYC that's what they think. I bet he gets great service in restaurants because the server is afraid of being killed if he pisses off a member of "the family". These are the things I think of while you're all at work.

He definitely looks like a mobster in that hat.

This is the face of a warrior.
OK moving on. Let's get to the facts.

Some actual facts about Michael
  • 6'0" 193lbs
  • Born June 24th, 1990 in Stouffville, Onatrio
  • Age: 21
  • Drafted 20th overall in the 2008 NHL entry draft by the New York Rangers
  • Nicknames: Del Z, MDZ
Guys got moves
Sure he's a defenseman so he's not going to have the greatest highlight reels, but trust me the kid has got some serious skill. 
  Pretty slick Del Z. 
Um yea. That's pretty amazing for a forward. Seriously is than anything sexier than a defenseman joining the rush? 
The best part of that video is Jack Edwards talking shit, then MDZ scoring a great goal. It's like he heard him and then promptly told him to fuck off. 

You're such a jokester
What is this? What prompted this to happen? Why is Brian Boyle such a giant? I have so many questions!!!!
Michael wore this to the Rangers ugly Christmas sweater party. I promptly bought one because who doesn't want a sweater where Rudolph is in the middle of a reindeer threesome?
The 24/7 effect
No doubt Del Zotto benefited from this effect. I had no idea who he was before the show honestly. But after? Well....  
You're adorable. 
Even though he spent half the show bleeding, I was still pretty turned on.
"Fuck me, Am I bleeding?" I don't know if you're bleeding, but yes I will fuck you.

That's gonna leave a mark.
Picture time!
Hockey players in suits.....swoon

Sup baby!

Brandon Prust tweeted out this photo explaining Del Zotto was being a wimp at the Giants game. Apparently they stole some girls jacket because he was cold. You know there are ways to keep warm Michael that I'm sure I can help with.

Nice hair gel.

What is this suit? LOL.

Apparently the Rangers don't believe in buttons.

This photo is gold. That guy is literally jumping over those girls just to get a piece of Del Z. Calm down guy! I know he's irresistible but chill.

Yes, so much yes. Look how nerdy these guys are. We all know Cody Hodgson is a giant nerd, but the other guys(Steven Stamkos and Alex Pietrangelo) wow.

OK, OK, I'll follow you on twitter if I have to jeez.

hahaha something tells me he doesn't want this picture circulating around. Nice khakis.

Yes I know Brian Boyle I'm sorry I didn't feature you yet. Don't worry I didn't forget it's coming.

Are there any other crazy bitches you are crazy into Michael Del Zotto? Let's find out! How? By checking his Talk Sports girlfriend page of course! If you've never checked one of these out I highly recommend it. Easily the most entertaining/terrifying thing on the Internet.

"Exactly. He's 21. Nowhere near ready to settle down. He doesn't date either, people."--Someone has logic on this page? Blasphemy. 

"I dont get these guys, if they played their cards right they can have any girl they want...instead hes a creeper on fb and twitter and borderline harrasses model that want nothing to do with him."--The only way she knows this is if she was stalking him online, so pot meet kettle.

"I had an AHL/NHL player on twitter messaging me all the time and he followed me and the only girls it seemed he followed were models or playboy models (who I think are gross), and who didn't follow him back. Ha. I ignored this player, but he kept messaging me and finally he stopped following me. Guess he got the message....but it was like every day he followed a "model/s". "--
Amazing humble brag right here.

"he goes for easy girls"--haha duh!

"Yep. He asked me "have we met before?" "--Another awesome humble brag. 

"I miss you...cant wait to see you. Then if you cant see him...he deletes you. This repeats again and again

Oh and after he deletes you he will wait a while and message you his I told him hahaha I don't have a Blackberry and then next message from him had his phone number...hahahaha sooooo pathetic
"--OK Ladies we get it you like to brag about hockey players flirting with you, but really things that happen when you're daydreaming aren't real OK. I hope you get the help you need. 

"I don't think he has "met" (in person) the majority of the women he follows. He follows them in hopes of meeting them and hooking up with them when they're in the city (some of the "models" aren't even based in nyc or the us in general) or when/if he happens to be in their city. This is how it appears to me, and if that is the case, it's even weirder. He creeps around finding these girls on twitter/facebook/the internet and doesn't even know them really"--What? How do you know this? What are you even talking about? Please start taking your medication again.      

Ok that's it folks! Got any ideas of who should be featured? Share in the comments below, or send them to me via Twitter @lafreak331.  

1 comment:

  1. He dated a nurse last year, they were chill together.