Wednesday, March 21, 2012

OGOP Playoff Push Drinking Game!

The push for the playoffs can be a stressful time for NHL fans. The parity in the league is at an all time high, and there are going to be very good teams who miss the playoffs because of it. So what's a fan to do? How can fans relieve some of that stress? Drink or course!
He must be a Columbus fan.

But don't just drink for the hell of it, make it a game! I'm here to help you in your sweet demise into alcoholism. I know what can I say I'm a giver.

First off this game is for fans of teams who are battling for a playoff position, so St.Louis and Columbus fans don't really need to worry about anything. But fans of teams duking it out for that 8th spot will definitely be in dire need of this. There are some rules however:
  1. Pick out a drink of choice for the game. Whether you're a beer lover (like me), wino, or going for the hard stuff it's best to pick one beverage and stick with that all night.
  2. Pick out which things you're going to drink to. It's best to start with just one and work your way into your alcoholism.
  3. Have fun, remember that's why you watch this STUPID TEAM!!!!!!!!

Alright Let's jump right in!

His team is in 11th, but only 1 point out of 7th. It's complicated.


Take a Drink (the basics, for the newbie)
  • Every time your team scores a goal, yay!
  • Every time your team let's up a goal, fuck!
  • Every time your teams goalie makes an amazing save, because he's saving your teams ass!
  • Every time your team wins in regulation, cause damn that feels good. 
  • Every time your team goes to overtime, bonus if they give an opponent near them in the race a point, because well shit.
  • Chug the whole thing if your team losses, bonus if it's regulation, because well you're fucked.  
"The goalie let in a goal from center ice???!!!!!???????"

Secondary Drinking (For the more advanced alcoholic)
  • Take a drink every time a team near you in the standings wins their game. Dammit.
  • Take a drink when a team near you in the standings loses their game, FUCK YES!!!!!
  • Take a drink when your team is in the playoffs at the end of the night, success!!!
  • Chug the whole thing if your team won their game, but still isn't in playoffs, GOD DAMN MOTHERKJNSAJNCBSKBSVMJOIFVHLESF.
This is what happens when your team blows a three goal lead in the third.

Deep Cuts (warning do not attempt this shit unless you really have a drinking problem)
  • Take a drink every time your team scores on their own goal.
  • Take a drink every time your goalie let's in a soft goal.
  • Take a drink every time your teams turns the puck over and it results in a goal against.
  • Chug the whole thing if the opponent wins the game in the final few minutes of the game. Bonus drink if your team had the lead and blew it. 
  • Take a drink every time your team scores a hilarious goal on an opponent.
  • Take a drink every time a defenseman on your team scores a coast-to-coast goal.
  • Take a drink every time your team scores an empty net goal, because it's in the bag baby!
  • Chug the whole thing if your team has a comeback win, because FUCK YES PLAYOFFS!!!!!
  •  
Fuck Yes.



3 comments:

  1. Hey there! Nice site. Saw you on royalhalf and thought I'd check out another female blogger! We are primarily Kings, but its nice to see other female hockey fanatics. :-)

    I'm probably older than you, but can still party with the best! right on.

    tracykingslover

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I read your blog all the time! Thanks for checking my site out.

      Delete
    2. Hockey girls need to stick together! lol, I'll add you to our blog roll. GKG!

      Delete