Thursday, February 28, 2013

Flavor of the Week: Colin Wilson

Disclaimer: This post may will contain NSFW material, and it's only to be viewed if you can handle hot hockey players being objectified. There will be swooning and guaranteed inappropriate language. Sure it's shallow and often crude, but what's fun about being serious all the time? There also may be actual hockey analysis, but that is not guaranteed. Enjoy! 

 Is this a goal celebration or Colin's reaction to finding out he's Flavor of the Week?
I think we all know the answer. 


Flavor of the Week is back people! Rejoice! This week I thought I would feature a guy I literally stumbled upon when I was "researching" my Cosmo post. It's an odd pick considering my lack of love for the Predators, but damn Colin Wilson is cute. Let's face it, when it comes to a pretty face, the jersey doesn't really matter. So let's get to why I picked Colin.


Actual Facts

Position: Center

Number: 33 (solid life choice there) 

Height: 6' 1" (legitimately thought he was bigger after seeing him play in person *Giddity*)

Weight: 216

Born: October 20, 1989 in Greenwich, CT (AMERICA!)

Age (for those allergic to math): 23

Drafted: 1st round (7th overall) in 2008 by the Nashville Predators. 

College: Boston University (for two years! you go Colin!) 

Nicknames: I'm assuming it's something like "Wilsy"possibly "Willy" and that would be the shit honestly, but his fan-given nickname of "Free Willy" is pretty great.   

   
He opened the wrong door...
Last year during the playoffs Darren Pang introduced us to the "Roman Polak Door", a door that no one should EVER EVER EVER open. Well...Colin unfortunately didn't know about that door, and he opened that bitch a few years back. Luckily, he lived to tell his tale. Actually, he fared relatively well. Well...at least better than Justin Braun did.



If you were not turned on by that, you're not human. Colin is one tough mother fucker. I'm just glad Polak didn't mess up that adorable face too much. 

 While I might not be the biggest advocate of fighting, Colin makes it look damn good. 
He beat the Thrashers so bad, they had to retreat to Winnipeg. 

Goldie Locks
My love for blonde guys is pretty well known if you've spent any time on the blog, or follow me on Twitter. So of course, there has to be a section dedicated to Colin's Golden Locks of Freedom*. 

*Please Note: Golden Locks of Freedom is reserved exclusively for American hockey players with the hair of the Gods. 



Touch my face Colin, or let me touch your face. Either way...touching please.


Oh God look at how adorable he is...come to me!



Sup ladies...


Sweet Lord. This gif is so pointless except for the fact that Colin is sooooooo pretty.
He's kind of nerdy, but it only makes me want him more
Nerds get me hot. No idea why, but awkwardness is like cat nip to me. I want to slay that shit! I want that uncomfortable man on and/or under me. Either way, if you are nerdy, awkward, or just plain weird, you've earned your way into my pants.


This is so ridiculous, I can't even comprehend it. 
At least he's not painfully awkward like JVR (who I love by the way). 

You're doing it wrong Colin!

HAHA look at him! I love the little kid pictures, and this is such a classic! The yellow hair was foreshadowing!

 "OK Colin act cool man...gotta impress this hot blonde interviewing you"
*Laugh awkwardly*
*Make uncomfortable hand movements*
FAIL

Awww...that fan is so lucky. Dammit.

Most Nerdy Adorable Awkward Smile Ever.

Oh this can't end well...

Nope not going well...will end in embarrasment.

Yep...this ended horribly awkward and also totally cute.
 Ummm....I don't know how I feel about this. 
I mean I guess he's pretty flexible and stuff, so that's good...you know for the sex.
I'm still a little uncomfortable. 
 
He Loves His Bros
Everyone love a good Bromance! 
I love everything about this!

GIVE ME HUGS I REQUEST HUGS!!!

You should ask Mr. Moneybags to buy you a big boy suit!

Photobombing his homie Rich Clune...with his nakedness. PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!
He's one of the few athlete's who's fun on Twitter
It's far too rare these days. Hockey players seem to be more fun on social media in general, but I do particularly enjoy Colin. 
That's freaky...like I'm pretty sure that's him. (Note to self: Find this product!)

WOAH WOAH.....Is this speaking from personal experience??

This was my exact first response... 

This is me...exactly. We can death grip each other on the plane Colin. Call me.

Technically this is from Facebook, but whatever. PS: Welcome to my life a year ago...It gets better, I promise.
 
More pictures? Why not! 
Honestly what else do you come here for? It's sure isn't hockey analysis I'm sure of it. 
 I would make fun of that tank top so much but....
PUPPY!!!!!!!

I see Colin is in the "I don't wear shirts under my gear" club. I approve!

I can't get over how nerdy he always looks. So. Awesome.
That picture reminds me of this....
 Of course everything reminds me of Gabe. 
Maybe it's the blonde hair, but he's does look like a chubby faced version of Gabe sometimes. 

Yep...no clothes under the gear. I bet that smells great.

If he's not laughing at Logan Couture's face, I give up.

 Awwww.....those small children love him. 
That puppet however is scary as shit. 
Haunting my dreams in 3...2..

You know what time it is!!!!
Yep! It's time to see what the other crazy women/men have to say on the Talk Sports Girlfriend Page!!! (Now with actual screen caps!)
 
He knows where the money at...
Woah Woah...Brit Brit is the shit, and that also applies to all family members. Know your place!

Stalker Alert! It's cool girl, do your thing, just don't let the cops catch you!

Good, just the way I like it.

Boring. Factual, but boring.

No idea what this person is talking about, but yes he is attractive.

MEOW! Someone is bitter. Chill out OK, green is not your color.


Somehow the question of a player being gay always comes up. I could care less, but if it was true, you boys are lucky lol.

OH REALLY??? EVERYTHING SAID ON THE INTERNET ISN'T FACTUAL??? MY WORLD IS SHATTERED!!!

Parting Shot!
  Soooo.....I just need a minute alone...
You're Welcome Everyone! 
Please send all gifts via e-mail, as I don't want the proper authorities knowing my whereabouts.

There you have it! Another successful Flavor of the Week post! Do you have a suggestion for a future post? Send me a Tweet, E-mail, Comment, or whatever. (Pictures are also always welcome!)

3 comments:

  1. Excellent choice!

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  2. LOVE THIS!For a future flavor of the week post I would recommend Sidney Crosby and Jonathan Toews (I love my captains!)

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  3. May I ask where you find the pictures you include and such? I'm starting a blog and wondering where to go to find original stuff! I use a lot of stuff from Tumblr myself! THANKS!!!

    ReplyDelete